


i'm not going anywhere (but it's bound to happen someday)

by leyxo



Category: Sam and Colby, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: 5+1 Things, Angst, Best Friends, Colby Brock Needs A Hug, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Relationships, Sam Golbach Has Issues, Sam Golbach Is a Good Bro, Social Media
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-27
Updated: 2019-05-27
Packaged: 2020-03-20 00:46:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18981745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leyxo/pseuds/leyxo
Summary: Five times Sam stays with Colby, and one time he can't.





	i'm not going anywhere (but it's bound to happen someday)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Colby starts dating a popular girl at their high school.
> 
> In hindsight, Sam figures he should've known it wouldn't end well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got a bit carried away writing this one. i hope you enjoy the product of my sleepless mind ❤︎
> 
> EDIT: this work (being 5+1) is supposed to have six chapters, but i can't give any promises to when the other five will be posted because none of them are fully written as of now. just figured that i'd let you guys know that i haven't forgotten about this work, i just, frankly, don't have the inspiration to work on it right now.

The bags under Colby's eyes seem to be getting deeper by the day. Sam doesn't think much of it at first; they're juggling social media with school, attempting to balance non-stop content creation with study nights. Despite his parents' approval of his future plans, Sam's intent on pushing for the highest grades possible, so he grows accustomed to caffeine-driven nights, solving differential equations with one hand and typing away on his laptop with the other. Colby often spends those nights with him, though more on his phone than actually studying as of late.

_In spite of its relatively low per capita income, the growth of Cambodia's economy is one of the fastest in the region at the moment. The country's economy relies mainly on industry and tourism—_

Colby's phone chimes behind him.

— _which has led to increased foreign investment and international trade. Cambodia has also become a member of quite a few international organizations—_

There's another ding.

— _including the United Nations (UN), the Association of Southeast Asian Nations—_

Colby's phone gives several dings in succession. Suppressing a sigh, Sam stops typing for a moment to rub at his temples.

“Can't you put it on silent?”

“Shit, sorry.” The bed sheets rustle as Colby shifts. “It's Leah.”

Something in his voice captures Sam's attention. He skim-reads the paragraph he's just written, saves the essay and turns around in his chair. Colby's on the flat of his back in Sam's bed, frowning up at the ceiling. His phone lies discarded by his head, the screen lighting up every five seconds.

“You ignoring her or something?”

Colby gives him a look, unimpressed. “No.”

“You sure about that?”

“I'm not ignoring her,” Colby huffs, swiping a hand over his face. “I told her I'm at your place, studying. Promised to call her when I got home.”

“Why don't you call her right now? Looks like she really wants to talk to you, bro.”

“Well, I don't,” Colby snaps.

Sam starts at his friend's harsh tone. He's seen Colby irritated in the past, but has never heard him speak with such bitterness. It resonates in his chest, tugs at memories tucked away at the back of his mind. Reminds him of a blond-haired girl with lips the color of cherry, her pearly laugh as she—

“Sorry, I didn't mean to be rude.”

Sam blinks, returning to the present. Colby's peering at him from under the arm thrown over his face, biting the inside of his cheek.

“Don't worry about it. We're both tired.” Sam glances at the clock on his laptop. It's almost eleven p.m. already. “How about we call it a night?”

They end up talking for another hour before Colby packs up his things and goes home. As Sam's locking the front door after bidding him goodnight, he hears the other's faint voice from outside.

“Hey, babe. Sorry, I was at Sam's...”

 

 

Leah Davis is a fellow senior at Blue Valley High and the captain of the school's cheerleading team. She's tall and slim, with long chestnut brown hair and green eyes, charming with her bright smile and sharp wit. She and Colby have been dating since they hit it off at a party four months ago.

“I mean, it's crazy, dude,” Colby says one time, a few weeks after they've officially got together. “Crazy that someone like her wants to date someone like me.”

Sam agrees. It is crazy. He and Colby, two kids in the school's marching band, have never been popular. Doing Vine hasn't certainly helped their case, encouraging others to make fun of them rather than include them in their social circles. To Sam, it's mind-boggling that Leah, picture-perfect and sought after by most guys in their year, would date Colby, a dorky social media kid. But seeing his friend's dopey smile, Sam pushes his suspicions aside and tells Colby he's happy for him.

As the weeks and eventually months go on, Sam feels his restlessness ebb away. He hangs out with the couple on occasion, realizes that Leah's not only witty and incredibly passionate about her hobbies, but also genuinely interested in what the boys are doing on social media. Colby's visibly relieved that his best friend and girlfriend are getting along; even under the pressure of their increasing workload, he doesn't lose his energy or enthusiasm. It's contagious and, as a result, they find themselves posting more frequently with newfound creativity.

“Leah's asking if she can come along,” Colby says another time, as they're talking about revisiting an abandoned warehouse in Overland Park. “That cool with you?”

Exploring abandoned places is something the two of them have been doing for a couple of years now. It's their passion, one they like sharing with their other friends by bringing them along. So Sam gives his assent without a second thought. They end up having to run away from a homeless man and getting lost on their way back, but otherwise they have a good time.

In hindsight, Sam supposes he should've known better.

 

 

**LEAH**

**Text Message**

**Today 11:33 PM**

 

_hey_

_u up?_

_yea_

_can u help me w/ math?_

_colby told me ur good at it ;)_

_sure i can try_

_omg bless u_

_mby its easier if i call?_

👍

 

 

Colby and Leah have been dating for almost four months when they have their first proper argument.

After a long day packed with pop quizzes and tedious group projects, Sam wants nothing more than to go home and have a six-hour-long nap. In the hallway, rounding the corner to the lockers, he bumps into someone.

“Sorry—”

Leah pushes past him without a single glance in his direction. Dumbfounded, Sam watches her stalk down the hallway, her hands clenched at her sides. He hovers in the middle of the moving crowd, wondering whether he should go after her or—

“Hey.”

Sam turns around. It's Colby, bearing a smile that doesn't quite reach the eyes.

_Of course._

“Did you guys have a fight or something?”

Colby's smile falls. He looks down, shuffles his feet. “Sort of.”

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.”

Sam's quiet for a moment. “Are you doing anything now?”

Colby stiffens. “You wanna film something?”

“Nah, I'm too tired. We could just order food and chill at my place though. Watch a movie or something.”

Colby lifts his gaze, meeting Sam's. The corner of his mouth ticks up.

“Sounds good,” he says softly.

 

 

**LEAH**

**Text Message**

**Today 5:28 PM**

 

_hey im sorry i marched off like that_

_nothing to do w/ u i swear_

_we just had a fight_

_colby and i_

_he's just difficult sometimes :/_

_im sure u know_

_it wasnt anything serious tho_

_can i call u?_

_its ok_

_i cant rn_

_busy_

_oh ok_

_later?_

_mby_

❤️

 

 

Suddenly, Colby shifts against him, startling Sam so badly he almost drops his phone.

“What is it?” he asks groggily.

Her name burns on Sam's tongue, but he swallows it.

“Nothing important,” he lies, tucking the phone in his pocket. “Go back to sleep.”

“M'kay,” Colby mumbles, curling further into the other's chest.

They are situated in Sam's bed, with a movie playing on his laptop and empty pizza boxes littering the floor. At some point, Colby had slithered himself against Sam, falling asleep an hour into the movie.

“Your heart's beating really fast,” Colby comments then.

“You scared me, that's all,” Sam says quickly. “I thought you were asleep.”

Colby snorts. “Sorry. Next time, I'll give you a warning.”

“Next time, I'll push you off the damn bed.”

Colby makes an affronted noise. “Wow, rude. You would never.”

“You think I'm bluffing?”

“Don't you even—SAM!”

Colby yelps as Sam deftly jabs his fingers into his side, right where he's most ticklish. Using the other's distracted state to his advantage, Sam easily twists him around and pins him down onto the bed with his weight. Colby glares at him through the few stray curls that have fallen into his face.

“What?” Sam asks innocently.

“You're fucking mean,” Colby replies in an accusatory tone.

“ _Language_ , Cole.”

“You're lucky I love you,” Colby mutters.

Ignoring the skip of his heart, Sam says, “Hey, I love you, too. It's just tough love, ya know?”

“I'm still mad at you.”

“What for?” Sam asks incredulously.

“For fucking _tackling_ me, you jerk.”

“Ugh, you're so whiny.” At Colby's sudden frown, he quickly adds, “Just kidding.” He thinks for a moment, then grins. “There's still ice cream in the freezer.”

Colby bites the inside of his cheek, clearly conflicted. “Now you're just bribing me.”

“Of course.”

“Fine,” Colby huffs. “You win. Bring me the ice cream.”

“Getting bossy now, are we?” Sam teases, climbing off the bed.

Laughing, he dodges the pillow Colby chucks in his direction.

“Do you ever _stop_?”

 

 

“Hey, babe. Sorry, I was at Sam's...”

Sam's hand lingers on the door handle.

_They're just text messages._

His fingers curl tighter around the metal.

 _He deserves to know. I'm not like_ her _._

He can hear her laughing—the girl with blond hair and cherry-red lips. She's raking her fingers through his hair, digging into his nape with her sharp acrylic nails.

_I can't be like her._

_Don't worry, baby, you won't be like me,_ she purrs into his ear. _But you'll definitely be a_ liar _._

“Sam?”

Starting, he spins around. It's just his mother, standing in the doorway to the kitchen. She cocks her head, eyeing him curiously.

“What are you doing?”

“I was just seeing Colby out.”

Sam's heart is pounding in his throat. He feels breathless. Lightheaded.

“Oh, okay,” his mother says, walking over to him. “How's he doing?”

_liar liar liar_

“Huh?”

“How's Colby doing?” his mother repeats, placing her hands gently on his shoulders.

“He's doing fine. Why?”

She shrugs. “Dunno, he's been looking tired recently. You two should take some time off.”

Sam sighs. “We can't, mom. With school and—”

“I know, honey.” She measures her son with a look before pressing a quick kiss to his head. “Go to bed. It's late. You're looking tired, too.”

 

 

**LEAH**

**Text Message**

**Today 1:56 PM**

 

_hey u busy tonight?_

_why?_

_answer the question dummy_

_not busy_

_i wanna see the new avengers movie_

_age of ultron_

_come w/ me? :)  
_

_i didnt know u liked marvel_

_i love marvel_

_dont u?_

_well yea_

_but dont u wanna see it w/ colby?_

_he's busy :/_

_told me to ask u instead_

_really?_

_yea ofc_

_sooo_

_avengers?_

_yes or no?_

_dunno if its a good idea_

_cmon_

_it'll be fun_

_ok_

_sure_

_yayy_

_starts at 7 ;)_

 

 

Outside the movie theater, Leah greets Sam with a hug. Her arms twine tightly around his torso, pulling herself flush against him. Unsure where to put his hands, Sam eventually places them lightly on her upper back. He draws in a breath, nearly chokes on the smell of her perfume.

“It's so good to see you,” she mumbles into the crook of his neck.

“It's good to see you, too,” Sam replies automatically.

Leah steps back, links her arm through his. “Shall we?”

Sam nods and lets himself be led into the theater.

As they're waiting in line to the box office, he sneaks a glance at Leah. She has a faint smile glued to her lips while her hand fiddles with the sleeve of her jacket. Her gaze is constantly moving around as though she's looking for something.

 _She's clever,_ a familiar voice says at the back of his mind. _You gotta give her that._

_But why would she go through the trouble of doing all this?_

_For fun, obviously!_ the voice chirps. _Always for fun. I guess you wouldn't understand though. You were always so_ boring _._

Sam's hand clenches at his side. _I'_ _m_ _not boring._

 _And I'm just in your head, thank god._ She is twirling a blond curl around her finger, her gray eyes boring into him. _Why are you here anyway if you already know the truth?_

_I don't know if it's the truth._

She sighs. _When will you stop lying to yourself, baby?_

“Sam?”

Leah's looking at him, a quizzical furrow in her brow.

“Sorry, I, uh...” He swallows heavily. “You just, um, look very nice today.”

She blinks, clearly taken aback, before flashing him a brilliant smile. “Thanks.”

 

 

**COLBY**

**Text Message**

**Today 7:23 PM**

 

_bro_

_call me back_

_please_

_i need to talk to u_

_about leah_

_shes acting weird_

_dunno what to do_

 

 

Sam stumbles into the restroom at the movie theater. With a surge of relief, he finds it empty. He totters over to the sinks, proceeds to splash cold water onto his face and into his mouth. Eventually, he looks up, meeting the gaze of his reflection.

The other Sam is hunched over, small and blurry around the edges. His skin appears translucent in the yellow light of the restroom, the circles around his eyes dark enough to be considered bruises.

“You're overreacting,” Sam tells his reflection. “You're fucking overreacting.”

 _You're looking tired, too,_ his mother's voice echoes at the back of his mind.

“You're just tired,” Sam rambles, clenching his hands. "Stressed. Fucking stressed. Otherwise you're doing fine, so stop fucking overreacting. You're fine, everything's _fine_.” His voice cracks.

_I know you want me, Sam. I can tell._

He does a one-eighty and bolts into one of the stalls.

_Do you want me, too?_

Sam throws up until there's nothing but bile left. His heart is thumping in his ears, resembling the deafening explosions from the movie. The air is dry and painful in his lungs, and he dry-heaves, his whole body trembling from the effort.

_C'mon, Colby will never know._

All he's left with is the bitter, acidic taste of popcorn and Coke in his mouth.

 

 

**LEAH**

**Text Message**

**Today 9:39 PM**

 

_way to leave a girl hanging_

_jerk_

 

 

After what feels like a thousand tries, Sam drops his phone in defeat. He considers calling Colby's home number, but decides against it. If Colby doesn't want to talk to him, he won't. Sam's known him long enough to be sure of it.

Which means he already knows.

_liar liar liar_

That night, Sam dreams of _her_.

They're chasing each other, water guns in hand, in the spacious backyard of her house. She shrieks and laughs as he sprays her with the water. She's wearing a dotted white dress, he notices, one of her favorites. It's soaked, clinging to her petite body.

Of course, she notices him looking.

“Pervert!” she laughs and shoots water right in his face.

“Sorry!”

He wipes the water out of his eyes. Lifting the gun, he realizes it's no longer _her_ , but Leah standing fifteen feet away from him. She's wearing the same dotted white dress, flush against her lithe frame. Her water gun lies discarded at her feet.

Leah smiles, baring her teeth.

“I know you want me, Sam.” Her hands glide downward to play with the hem of her dress. “Don't you want me, too?”

Sam jolts awake, drenched in cold sweat.

For the first time in a while, he's dreading going to school.

 

 

**COLBY**

**Text Message**

**Sunday** **8** **:** **12** **P** **M**

 

 

_sorry_

_my phone was on silent_

_we need to talk_

_face to face tho_

_tmrw?_

**Read Sunday 9:40 PM**

 

**Today 11:45 AM**

 

_can u come to the restroom_

_2nd floor_

 

_why_

 

**Today 11:48 AM**

 

_im on my way_

 

 

The boys' restroom on the second floor is vacant except for one stall at the end of the row.

Sam taps on the stall door with his knuckles. “Colby? It's me.”

The door clicks open. Sam huffs in surprise as he's yanked into the stall by his shirt. Colby falls back onto the closed toilet lid, leaving Sam to scramble for balance. They almost knock heads, and Sam catches himself by grabbing onto Colby's shoulders.

“Uh...” Sam clears his throat. “It's a bit cramped in here, don't you—”

“Lock the door.”

Sam's mouth snaps shut. He fumbles behind himself for the lock, manages to push it in place. Returning his hand to Colby's shoulder, he settles himself into a wide stance to avoid tumbling into the other's lap.

“She broke up with me,” Colby says, muffled by Sam's chest. “Before 3rd period.”

“Oh.” Mentally kicking himself, Sam adds, “I'm sorry. Uh, how was it?”

“Pretty shit.”

_tell him tell him tell him_

“Colby, I—” Sam takes a deep breath, bracing himself. “There's something I need to tell you.”

“I figured.” Colby turns his head slightly so that his ear is right against the other's chest. “Your heart's beating really fast.”

Sam's throat constricts. Suddenly, he wants to put as much distance between them as possible; he doesn't _deserve_ to have Colby this close to him after he—

“Sam?”

“Huh?”

He's back at his front door, torn between going after Colby and doing _nothing_. Breathless. Lightheaded. _Tired_.

 _Liar,_ she—because it's always her now—whispers. _Such a dirty little liar._

Colby leans back, tugs at the hem of Sam's shirt. Sam meets his gaze; it takes all of his willpower to not look away again. Colby's eyes are rimmed red, his lashes wet. Some of the tear tracks are still present on his flushed face.

“You wanted to tell me something.” His voice is hoarse, oddly weak.

And Sam tells him. Tells him about his initial suspicions about their relationship. Her eventually winning his trust. The occasional, seemingly innocent text messages. Her asking him out to see the new Avengers movie. Her trying to kiss him and—

_other things?_

—someone's camera flashing in the dark and—

_or did he imagine it?_

—him simply booking it after that. Him feeling confused, unsure how to tell Colby, how to make it clear that he, Sam, isn't trying to—

“I know,” Colby says suddenly. “Some of it at least. She told me when we broke up.”

Sam stares at him, not knowing whether he wants to cry or throw up.

“I'm—I'm so fucking sorry, Colby. I should've told you sooner.”

Colby shakes his head. “It's okay—”

“No.” Sam's grip tightened on Colby's shoulder. “No, it's not okay. Aren't you angry?”

“I am. I just... can't really feel it right now, I guess. I'm not mad at you though.”

“Colby—” Sam protests.

“It wasn't just you, Sam,” Colby says impatiently. “There were... others. You were just a _side project_.” He spits the last bit out with bitterness.

Sam's quiet for a moment. “She wanted to split us up, didn't she?”

“Yeah.” Colby clenches his jaw. “It didn't work though. I didn't believe her.”

“Why?” The question slips out before Sam can stop himself.

Colby's expression softens. “I remembered what happened with you and—you know. I realized you wouldn't do something like this. Figured she had to be the one lying.”

The girl dances in Sam's memory, her blond curls bouncing along. She twirls on the tips of her toes, swings her arms around the neck of a guy, whose face Sam doesn't remember. Her cherry-red lips curl into a mischievous smile.

_Why are you here if you already know the truth?_

“What if she posts the pictures,” he hears himself say, “screenshots of our messages anyway?”

“It wouldn't matter 'cause _we're_ still together. Graduation's in, like, two weeks. We'll be leaving her and this hellhole behind soon enough.” Colby sighs. “You should get back to class.”

“No.”

Colby frowns. “Sam—”

“I'm not going anywhere.”

Sam raises his brows, silently daring the other to send him away. At Colby's conflicted expression, however, uncertainty flits through his chest. Is he pushing his luck? Colby said he wasn't mad at him, but what if—

Colby casts his eyes down. “Okay.”

He leans his head against Sam's chest. Ignoring the ache in his back, Sam inches a bit closer and rests a hand on his nape.

“This is nice,” Colby mumbles.

“My back fucking hurts.”

Sam doesn't have to look to know that Colby's rolling his eyes.

“And now you've ruined the moment.”

“I can't help it.” Sam sighs. “My age is catching up to me.”

“You're _eighteen_.”

“What?”

Colby snorts, shaking his head. “Nothing, you old man.”

_Smack._

“Ow,” Colby grumbles, rubbing his shoulder. “Violent much?” Not hearing another quip in response, he pulls back, his brow furrowed in concern. “Sam?”

“You and I..." Sam bites his lip, hesitant. "We're okay then, right?”

“Yeah." Colby places his hand on top of Sam's, giving it a light squeeze. His smile is soft, reassuring. “We're okay.”


End file.
